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Fake News

by lee christian

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1.
Blame + The Truly Sad But Sadly True Story Of Vietnam Bob (free) 05:04
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Blame: (fuckin’ ‘ell!) BLAME IT ON YOUR SCHEDULE, THERE’S NEVER TIME BLAME IT ON YOUR DIARY, THE DAILY GRIND BLAME IT ON THE BUS, IT’S ALWAYS LATE AIM AND FRAME THE THINGS U HATE BLAME IT ON THE HEADACHES, THEY HURT SO MUCH BLAME THAT DAMN INSOMNIA KEEPING U UP BLAME IT ON THE RAIN, BECAUSE IT’S WET PASS THE BUCK - IT’S THE SAFEST BET YOU CAN BLAME WHAT YOU WANT JUST COMPLAIN ALL YOU WANT FAKE THE STRAIN IF YOU WANT BUT IT’S YOU CONTEMPLATE ALL YOUR STRIFE, FEEL THE STRAIN YOUR WHOLE LIFE EXPLAIN AWAY YOUR WHOLE LIFE BUT IT’S TRUE IT’S ALL DOWN TO U DOWN TO U U WELL, THERE JUST AIN'T NO WAY I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU SAY U CAN TELL ME ALL DAY - IT’S NOT ME WELL, THERE JUST AIN'T NO WAY I DON’T CARE WHAT U SAY U CAN GIVE ME THE BLAME - IT’S NOT ME BLAME IT ON THE PARENTS, I’M JUST A KID BLAME IT ON EXGIRLFRIEND, SHE’S SUCH A BITCH BLAME IT ANYWHERE, BUT AT YOURSELF WHEN U GONNA GET SOME HELP? BLAME IT ON THE GOVERNMENT, U CAN’T GO WRONG BLAME IT ON SOCIETY, GOOD SCAPEGOAT BLAME IT ON THE COPS, JUST COZ THEY’RE DICKS STILL DON’T MEAN THAT YOU’RE NOT SICK WELL, THERE JUST AIN'T NO WAY I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU SAY U CAN TELL ME ALL DAY - IT’S NOT ME WELL, THERE JUST AIN'T NO WAY I DON’T CARE WHAT U SAY U CAN GIVE ME THE BLAME - IT’S NOT ME the truly sad but sadly true story of vietnam bob: there was this old dude named bob who lived in our block once an ex-vietnam vet with medals and a shotgun had a shitty paid job in construction had a problem with authority so his boss got punched had a problem with the whole damn world when he got drunk had a drug deal with a cripple that had gone all wrong had a balcony by the pool where the dealer sat and got sun had a really bad day so he shot just once blew the cripple and his wheelchair straight to kingdom come watched his flesh float on the pool surface like flotsam went back into his flat and thought "now what have you gone done?" put the barrel into his mouth until it burned the tip of his tongue put his finger on the trigger as if he'd never even shot a gun watched his life flash past his eyes as he counted "3 (stop!), 2 (stop!), 1." he said "i wish what everybody deserved is what everybody got just once... at least in death there's dignity for a soldier, with a gun... let's get this done (no!) just an harmless (?) old guy, who didn't have no-one a past of fighting for a country that didn't give a fuck a social life of latching onto other lonely drunks and a bunch of scars the medics couldn't sew up a future not at all like what was owed him from a country that disowned him (rest in peace)
2.
Price To Pay (free) 01:23
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i'm not your helpless victim i'm not your casualty i'm not some fatal car crash you can slow down to see if you're just rubbernecking waiting to see me fall if that's what you're expecting this is your wake up call while there's still breath left in me you can bet there's still fight left in me where there's a will there's a way it's not such a big price to pay just leave me to be direct like threats i can inject all the hate you can project until there's nothing left and if you finally kill me then a word to the wise best not bury me shallow because i'll come back to life while there's still breath left in me you can bet there's still fight left in me where there's a will there's a way it's not such a big price to pay there are no accidents so make your fucking move and you can bet your ass i'm coming back for you you.
3.
The American Way (free) 04:42
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we're made to win and taught to lose is a sin if you're not up in 1st place you're stuck back in last place again be the best they don't have time for the rest if you're not first rate champ u might as well be a tramp on the street i guess i got no choice but to go for the easy option feel such an outcast that i think i need a friend adoption i'm such a leper even god sent a letter of rejection but on the bright side i've got this loser thing down to perfection! i've got no clout and my credits run out girl, it's all about money ain't a damn thing that's funny without we're bred to excel to do everything well if you're not the star pupil the back of the class u will dwell i hear u say: "don't be weird black or gay! if you want to get on, it's just not the american way!" but i ain't no fool i think i'll blow up my school because on tv i heard that a little mass murder is cool. i'm a loser with capital 'L'.
4.
Slick 01:56
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make a decision based on intuition cut the ignition kill your emission stick to your ration from nation to nation check out the stations it's just self preservation or... your son's and daughter's sons and daughters "now don't you bring them into this!" your son's and daughter's sons and daughters DEAD! and here's the thing see... u killed 'em and i killed 'em and we killed 'em in a car in a bus in a plane not with a war but with no rational thought what are u? goldfishes?! it'll be like atlantis by the time your baby's 21 could be less than 200 years til we're done! and u know what that means... your son's and daughter's sons and daughters "well, i told u not to mention them!" your son's and daughter's sons and daughters "well, everybody else is doing it!' your son's and daughter's sons and daughters "look, it's not my fault, ok?!" your son's and daughter's sons and daughters DEAD! and aye, for there's the rub... u killed 'em and i killed 'em and we killed 'em in a car in a bus in a plane not with a war but with no rational thought and i killed 'em and u killed 'em and we killed 'em in a car in a bus in a plane and those friendly skies keep on getting much darker.
5.
Stand Up 04:49
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stand up fucking man up put your hand up come on now make your voice heard stand up fucking man up put your hand up or just your middle finger stand up for your liberty for your trial, your free elections and your family life stand up for your privacy, free thought, concious religion and assembly rights our hard won rights are under attack they want to take a civil liberties and push them to the back like fucking 1984 or maybe v for vendetta so i seriously suggest u think about signing this letter well our human rights have been put under threat they want to change it all up and it's fairly safe bet it's for the ends of the few, not the needs of the many well if it was left up to them, i really doubt we'd have any! can u really afford to ignore this? or are u willing to fight for it? well our way of life has been called into doubt they want to take away security and pull the rules out freedom of expression will forever be known as sin discrimination, torture and slavery creep in well everybody's so concerned about turning back the clock they don't want make the best of whatever we've got all that anybody's thinking is more, more, more so let the world turn corporate and pervert all the laws it's not right that the far right are trying to take away your rights! (so don't let them!)
6.
I See Red (free) 03:04
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well, honey i support that you're a feminist but could u please take your boot off my throat? and i'm fully behind you're LGBT rights but could u please camp out in someone else's yard? feel free to express your sexuality but let's not confuse or exploit young impressionable minds. and i totally agree that black lives matter but does that really mean u have to hate me just because i'm white? red! i just see red! i think you'll find they're HUMAN rights why focus on our differences? when what's more important is what's the same... like our mutual dislike of corporate interest or no desire to see our loved ones killed or maimed why do you want to put them on the outside? why do you want to put them out to sea? why do you wanna put them down and beat them down and keep them down? seems like this shit goes on eternally... well you'll get no fucking help from me because red's the only colour i see... red like the blood that boils inside red like the rivers that flow thorugh war red like the heat of society's furnace we'll turn red wondering that we're fighting for so when they tell you where to start pointing your fingers and they turn around and try to get me vexed well i've only got one question if you're granted your requests well, just who do you think they're coming after next? well, i get that u miss the good old days but do we really have to dial so far back? i think you'll find they're HUMAN rights and i understand that you're feeling really threatened right now but just who do u trust to have your back? red! i just see red!
7.
We're Fucked! (free) 01:54
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somebody smashed the egg timer somebody fucked the clock somebody flipped this shit right over somebody better listen up, listen up, listen up! we're fucked we're screwed there's really nothing left to do but rock and roll and have some fun before you're old or dead yes dead did u just hear a single word i said? i said our times run out so live what u have left. rock! rock! rock! "ladyboys and mentalmen this is a public disservice denouncement to tell u that you're fucked!" u know you're fucked u know you're screwed u know there's nothing left to do but rock and roll! now do what you're told to! somebody must be laughing somebody way up top some people can't stop winning but most people i know just want it to stop! we're fucked we're screwed there's really nothing left to do but rock and roll and have some fun before you're old or dead yes dead did u just hear a single word i said? i said our times run out so live what u have left.
8.
The Good Old Days 05:07
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cast your mind back to when sex was safe now sex is so dangerous you'd think there'd be less rape cast your mind back to when u'd leave open your door now you've got to keep a tight hold on your handbag at the grocery store well if only your god could see you now tell me with a straight face he'd be proud well don't worry, you're not going to hell you've been stuck there for years but u just couldn't tell! do u remember the good old days? well they didn't seem that great at the time but i guess that tells u everything u need to know about what was waiting for us down the line i'm not one for nostalgia or a rosey tint and i never thought the past would be a big thing to miss i don't even want to call them the good old days it just seemed much better than this is this how we show we're so much better then the animals? with rampant materialism and sophisticated war if this is all that's up ahead more so called progress well it's safe to say i liked it way much more before cast your mind back to when jesus was huge now people worship green gods and they've got their big green eyes on u now cast your mind back to when money actually bought u some fun now by the end of payday it's all gone, gone, gone and now the season can't even be relied on summer's always late and don't hang around that long proper-gander for culture - diversion. so u can turn off your brain and just nod your head along come on, it's fun! well if only your god could see you now tell me with a straight face he'd be proud well don't worry, you're not going to hell you've been stuck there for years but u just couldn't tell! do u remember the good old days? well they didn't seem that great at the time but i guess that tells u everything u need to know about what was waiting for us down the line i'm not one for nostalgia or a rosey tint and i never thought the past would be a big thing to miss i don't even want to call them the good old days it just seemed much better than this is this how we show we're so much better then the animals? with rampant materialism and sophisticated war if this is your idea of progress well i liked it more before cast your mind back to when family values were high not a bunch of 'moralistic' bullshit that's piled way up high to the sky now cast your mind back to the last time your saw someone smile because i've been scratching my head while now, for a long, long, long, long, long, long while...
9.
Real Life Nightmare (free) 04:37
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life's one big grey area it's never been a picnic but shit's getting scarier. when are we gonna get where we're going? when are supposed to find out what's worth knowing? there's ain't no denying, the tension's growing and there ain't no fight worth throwing (don't throw it away!) after every face has been on every mag after every gayly coloured plastic bag well what will our kids think of their moms and dads? when they realise it was us who let it get this bad everyone's for real or crap and no one gets a second chance. (all this fucked up reality - killing off the dreamer in me) (can't close my eyes when i go to sleep - real life nightmares all i see) too old for computers too young for thatcher too stupid to cheat more too smart to be a shelf stacker fighting the power to give peace a chance shaking our shit to the same war dance and the reds don't trust the blues and the blacks don't trust the whites and i don't trust nobody as far as line of sight and that suits me just fine because there's a much bigger fight and it's all over primetime tonight so are you gonna tune in? are you gonna turn on? and switch off your mind.

about

FakeNews site homepage art by grace williams & lee christian.
(photos from greg smolonski, grace williams, a dusty old photo album & the public domain)

many thanks to everyone involved and you for listening. peace.

credits

released March 22, 2017

perpetrated & propagated by lee christian
(in manchester, oxford & bath)

assisted by: (real names withheld to protect the guilty)
P.C. (axe assault 7 years)
B.H. (axe assault 9 years)
R.S. (pre-meditated assault 9 years)

provocation & battery:
D.A. (3 years)
M.A. & W.R. (7 years served together)
J.B. (1 year served. R.I.P.)
J.D. (on 2 separate charges: 5 & 8 years)
P.H. (+ coIIusion charge: 4 years)
G.(B).H. (2 accounts - 2 & 6 years)
D.K. (9 years)

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